Oh my God!!!  


My reaction finding out that my uncle died earlier today from a heart attack.  This year is ending on a very bad note.  I don't know how to react, but I found the courage to call my aunt and let her know that I'm there if they need me.  This is so unbelievable.  I was told that my mom isn't as alone anymore.  Well, maybe my mom wanted more company.  Is that fair though?  


She was never a selfish person, so I'm just glad that she's no longer alone.  I always saw my uncle and her as best friends.  I felt guilty that I stole the oven roaster from him at this year's family white elephant.  But then again, it was like his last gift to me.  Am I to learn to how to make great turkey and pot roast?  It is a bit ridiculous, but I hope my family and I get through this struggle that we went through just weeks ago.  


I'll miss you.  Give my mom a hug for me.  


Now, let's get the angry side of my brain.


WHAT THE F@#$!!!!!!!!  Why is this happening to my family all at the same time.  First the cancer, now a possible heart attack.  I find out my friend has gout.  Growing up sucks balls!!!  What's the point.  I want to learn news, get sad, and let it go.  But that's not going to happen at this point in my life.  I live, learn, remember, and feel the sadness that a loved one is gone.  


Please 2012 be better.