Posted by David Zinczenko & Comments by ME
From an early age, men get hammered with the same message about how to treat women: More compliments, more listening, more romance. That's all well and good, as it should be. But sometimes, especially as relationships progress, men can also feel on the short-end of the fawning stick: Nearly 70 percent of men say they wish they received more regular compliments from their partner. I'm not suggesting that every guy has to be coddled and cuddled with verbal roses, but every once in a while, it's nice to throw one his way. While guys aren't particularly amped by compliments like "nice eyes" or "you're so beautiful," there are a few, simple things a woman can say to a man that really get him going. To wit:
"Your arms are definitely looking bigger."
Men can be just as paranoid about the way their bodies look as women can be. In fact, nearly 90 percent of men in a national Men, Love & Sex survey say there's at least one body part they'd like to change (42 percent saying they want a new gut). While men don't necessarily want women to lie if they're out of shape, it never hurts to notice he's looking good -- or at least trying to look better.
Comment: You admire my arms even though they are nothing but fat storage.
"Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha."
Guys spend all of high school, the better part of the work day, and at least 12 times a day via e-mail trying to make people laugh. Because men value their sense of humor as one of their most important qualities, a hearty, genuine laugh is as flattering as it gets.
Comment: Need I say more. Although, you don't necessarily laugh at what I say or do, you laugh at what you're doing to me.
"Wow."
Doesn't matter whether it comes as he's getting undressed or after you've finished having sex, this short, sweet word (best done in a whisper) may just be the ultimate ego-stroke. A picture may say a thousand words, but this three-letter word sums up roughly 10,000 of them.
Comment: Stop looking at my butt. This goes out to everyone. Geez.
"You the man."
Guys hear this all the time. From other guys. They hear it at work, on the golf course, and when one dude from the group buys the beer. But if it comes from a woman -- no matter the context -- the message is that, hey, we're buddies, too. Which is actually pretty darn sexy.
Comment: Same as saying "What's up" when I call you. I already know I'm a man.
More than 50 percent of men say that their families -- more so than work and salary -- are what defines them most as men. So when a woman affirms that he's a familial hero, it's a compliment that stretches way beyond anything you could ever say about his haircut.
Comment: no comment.
"What do you think?"
We've all seen it a million times with long-married couples: They engage in cerebral power struggles, where neither can concede on anything -- whether it's the best way to move a piece of furniture or the fastest way to reach the interstate. I'm not saying that men should have the only say in decisions, but some guys do feel like they actually have very little.
Comment: Why do I always have to make the decisions? Just be patient and if you want me to decide, trust me. I know you're hungry, and I will continue to struggle to get you your rations. Yes, most of the time you're right, but sometimes positive motivation works better than negative.
"Cute feet."
Typically, it doesn't matter much to men if women like a part of their body that they don't control, like their eyes, jawline, or body hair. And typically, guys care for the word "cute" about as much as Paris cares for the penal system. One exception: The part of the body that is classified as being especially gross. Tell a guy he has good feet, and somehow he takes it as a double-bagger compliment -- that you not only like his genetics, but also that you appreciate he can keep himself better groomed than the rest of the gnarly-nailed heathens out there.
Comment: Let's stray away from what my butt looks like and concentrate on something else. Maybe something above my neck. Although we speak of my eyes, but only because they're hardly there. Aya.
"Meow."
The stats show that 61 percent of men think their partners aren't sexually adventurous enough. While a feline one-liner doesn't automatically qualify as adventurous, it does show a bit of inhibition, and the message is one he likes to hear: That perhaps he's brought a little bit of the animal out of you.
Comment: No comment. I haven't touched a female in 2 years. LOL.
"Impressive."
Guys love feats. They love accomplishments. They love being acknowledged for their strength, power, and, simply, their masculinity. So a well-timed observation like this one -- whether it comes after he carries a TV to the family room or figures out a way to fix the pipes without having to call the plumber -- feeds into his need to feel like the family protector.
Comments: That's why I enjoy those times when you watch my games, or fixing my stupid wood slats because I didn't completely finish building my bed. Did I mention that my bed was broken when I woke up this morning? So I switched to the other side. Aya.
"I want you."
Women don't need to go on about a guy's eyes or hair or clothes. What a guy really wants to hear is that he's the total package, and this acknowledgment of that -- whether it's referring to bedroom behavior or relationship stability -- is the ultimate compliment of them all.
Comments: I am JOEY BEAR!!!!!
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